and feel raw power begin to creep over your skin in a very pleasant way. Looking down at your self, you are shocked to see that your black robes have disappeared and have been replaced by a super short frilly pink dress.
You frown in confusion, and say out loud, "what is going on?"
"You have grasped the wand of Rainbow Unicorn Power, and are now a Rainbow Unicorn Magical Girl," says a tiny high pitched voice.
You turn around in a complete circle looking for the source of the voice, but see only the maggot covered corpse. To be sure, you bend down close to the corpse's head and say, "who are you?"
"I am the magic wand you just picked up, silly," the voice says, laughing.
You quickly pull your face away from the rotting head, and stare at the magic wand in your hand. "What do you want?"
"I want to help you get home. That's why I'm here in this shed. I appear where ever there is great need," the wand says.
"Great," you say, "so how do I get home, then?"
"You just have to hold me, and say the words 'By the power of the Rainbow Unicorn, there is no place I would rather be than at home with my kitten and puppy.' And then my magic will take us both home," said the rod.
"So I won't be giving some evil god my soul by saying this, right?" you ask.
"Oh, don't be silly. What would an evil god want with your worthless soul? Just do the spell, and we'll be off."
"Okay," you say doubtfully, but you figure it is worth a shot. "By the power of the Rainbow Unicorn, there is no place I would rather be than at home with my kitten and puppy," you cry in a loud voice.
At first nothing happens, and you feel very foolish for standing in a shed listening to buzzing flies while waiting for some magical power to take you home. But then, you feel a tug on your stomach, and with a loud POP sound, you are magically transported from the shed to a house. You don't remember anything about your past, but you assume this is your house, and to your joy, a puppy and kitten come running out the front door and cover you with kisses. You laugh, shrug, and walk into the house with your pets, and live happily ever after.